sunglasses at night

It’s a labyrinth, in a city. I am on a very broad street which joins a square right ahead of me. The three other streets are visible, two of them turning at the corner of two buildings. I know I have to reach  a place. Somewhere not too far away. It can’t be far now. I am dragging my feet as fast as I can. They move but I feel I am very slow. The landscape around me isn’t changing. I can feel the tall silhouettes of buildings all around me. I have a feeling of the path beneath my feet. Almost like a person. This place feels like a long-lost home. It evokes a stab of pain in my heart. Like an old sweethearts embrace which you wish to avoid. I sigh. An old sweetheart. A picture arises in my mind’s eye and my lips twist in a smile. A sad smile. But why is this place feeling familiar? Something tugs at me in the dark of the night. Instinctively I try to free myself, but I want to avoid looking at what it is. I think I am scared that it will be some little child asking for alms and it will be impossible to avoid it once I know it is there. Actually I would still have to leave it behind and it will break my heart in one more piece, filled with regret. I get the distinctive feeling that it is somebody’s fingers which are tugging at me. I try to guess if it is a child’s hand or a grown up’s but it is so difficult to decide. Frustrated, I look ahead with longing and spot a silver speck of light some distance away. It must be moonlight. It has to be. But it is kind of dark light. Puzzled, I look harder and try to think harder. The tug continues, however now I am increasingly aware of myself. There is something on my cheeks. A solid bar sort of thing. I try to figure out what it could be. The feeling on my face is coming back fast and only now I realize I was numb earlier. It’s like new water returning to a dry stream, slowly soaking the sand and wetting the rocks before it starts flowing fully. In a moment I am fully aware of my face. And now I know. There is a dark sunglass on my eyes. The tug on me comes in front of me. It is a man. He asks me why the hell am I wearing a sunglass at night. I am wondering about the same thing. I think for a few moments with my head down and then I look at the sliver of moonlight again. I wanted to reach there. That is definitely my place. There is an answer in that sliver. The stab in my heart is rising again. I wish I could reach…